A Letter From a Muslim Friend
Monday 28 July 2008
I found out that Sheah Nee just got married to Nazruddin from Daphne Iking's blog. Then, I found out about Naz's dad wrote in his blog on how they persuade Sheah Nee's family to accept Sheah Nee as a Muslim. This is very interesting.
Dear Friends,
My second son Nazrudin (Naz) has found his soulmate (Lee Sheah Nee) who is from Chinese-Australian parentage. Sheah Nee's father (Robert Lee) is traditional Hokkein Chinese and her mother Lesley is Australian of Scottish decent from Queensland. They have set their wedding date on 6.7.08 (July 6th).
Malaysian Muslim law requires Sheah Nee to convert to Islam. This "change" can be traumatic for some people and yet it has to be done for compliance with the Law here. It is quite normal for “converts“ to undergo the conversion procedures unceremoniously in the office or bureau of the Islamic Affairs department with two witnesses and the Official performing the conversion. Non Muslim parents and relatives usually do not attend this procedure mostly out of contempt. It is common to see converts breaking off their family ties, which is a sad thing.
I decided to do things differently. I already knew that Sheah Nee's mother had taken the news about her conversion rather badly as she is her only daughter and may consider her becoming a Muslim a “loss ". It took Lesley a few months to come to terms of the change in her daughter's life, as much as she adored Naz as a person.
Isha (my wife) and I first met the Lee's formally over a dinner in a restaurant. I then invited them over to our home to a dinner prepared specially by Isha. Both dinners helped to get us acquainted. Then came the preparations for the conversion ceremony. I decided that the ceremony would be done at our home and followed by an engagement ceremony. Only immediate relatives and the couple’s closest friends were invited.
I would like to share with you and your families to show you how I have brought together Scotland, China, India , Indonesia ( from our ethnic backgrounds ) and formed one family by this union between my son and his chosen one. There were some touching moments during this ceremony.
1) I had arranged that the official who performed the ceremony will be a Chinese Muslim who would conduct the proceedings in Arabic, Mandarin, Malay and English, which he did with excellence.
2) I insisted on reading my pledge to love, and protect Shean Nee as my own daughter. I told Lesley and Robert that this meant that have not lost a daughter, but also have gained another son. (They have a son Yen who lives in Brisbane, Australia)
3) I insisted that Lesley and Sheah Nee hold hands while she recited the oath of conversion. I wanted Lesley to feel that she still has her child and religion did not change their relationship. It was a touching moment and my assurance was appreciated by both Robert and Lesley. I am glad that this bond between mother and daughter remains intact.
After the ceremony, I recited a verse from the Islamic Hadith which relates to a question posed to our Holy Prophet Muhammad.........
“Who is the most important person in your life?”
The Holy Prophet Muhammad replied, “My mother".
The same question was asked again, "Who is the next most important person in your life?”
To which the Holy Prophet answered, “My mother ".
For the third time the same question was asked and the Holy Prophet answered, “My mother”.
For the fourth time, the same question was asked and the Holy Prophet answered, “My father.”
I turned to Sheah Nee and said to her, “Don’t you ever forget that”!
4) The engagement ceremony was performed by Isha, who put a diamond ring on Sheah Nee's finger.
A sweet ending to a simple but touching ceremony.
We are now all set for the July wedding with me and Isha quarreling about how to keep the guests list to below a thousand.
Dear Friends,
My second son Nazrudin (Naz) has found his soulmate (Lee Sheah Nee) who is from Chinese-Australian parentage. Sheah Nee's father (Robert Lee) is traditional Hokkein Chinese and her mother Lesley is Australian of Scottish decent from Queensland. They have set their wedding date on 6.7.08 (July 6th).
Malaysian Muslim law requires Sheah Nee to convert to Islam. This "change" can be traumatic for some people and yet it has to be done for compliance with the Law here. It is quite normal for “converts“ to undergo the conversion procedures unceremoniously in the office or bureau of the Islamic Affairs department with two witnesses and the Official performing the conversion. Non Muslim parents and relatives usually do not attend this procedure mostly out of contempt. It is common to see converts breaking off their family ties, which is a sad thing.
I decided to do things differently. I already knew that Sheah Nee's mother had taken the news about her conversion rather badly as she is her only daughter and may consider her becoming a Muslim a “loss ". It took Lesley a few months to come to terms of the change in her daughter's life, as much as she adored Naz as a person.
Isha (my wife) and I first met the Lee's formally over a dinner in a restaurant. I then invited them over to our home to a dinner prepared specially by Isha. Both dinners helped to get us acquainted. Then came the preparations for the conversion ceremony. I decided that the ceremony would be done at our home and followed by an engagement ceremony. Only immediate relatives and the couple’s closest friends were invited.
I would like to share with you and your families to show you how I have brought together Scotland, China, India , Indonesia ( from our ethnic backgrounds ) and formed one family by this union between my son and his chosen one. There were some touching moments during this ceremony.
1) I had arranged that the official who performed the ceremony will be a Chinese Muslim who would conduct the proceedings in Arabic, Mandarin, Malay and English, which he did with excellence.
2) I insisted on reading my pledge to love, and protect Shean Nee as my own daughter. I told Lesley and Robert that this meant that have not lost a daughter, but also have gained another son. (They have a son Yen who lives in Brisbane, Australia)
3) I insisted that Lesley and Sheah Nee hold hands while she recited the oath of conversion. I wanted Lesley to feel that she still has her child and religion did not change their relationship. It was a touching moment and my assurance was appreciated by both Robert and Lesley. I am glad that this bond between mother and daughter remains intact.
After the ceremony, I recited a verse from the Islamic Hadith which relates to a question posed to our Holy Prophet Muhammad.........
“Who is the most important person in your life?”
The Holy Prophet Muhammad replied, “My mother".
The same question was asked again, "Who is the next most important person in your life?”
To which the Holy Prophet answered, “My mother ".
For the third time the same question was asked and the Holy Prophet answered, “My mother”.
For the fourth time, the same question was asked and the Holy Prophet answered, “My father.”
I turned to Sheah Nee and said to her, “Don’t you ever forget that”!
4) The engagement ceremony was performed by Isha, who put a diamond ring on Sheah Nee's finger.
A sweet ending to a simple but touching ceremony.
We are now all set for the July wedding with me and Isha quarreling about how to keep the guests list to below a thousand.
posted @ 2:10 am,
4 Comments:
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At 28 July 2008 at 11:53,
Val Aziz said...
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Begegar dagu I baca the Prophet's words..huhuhuuu a daughter's priority somewat changes when she gets married and poor mum gets taken for granted.
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At 28 July 2008 at 12:18,
Linachu said...
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wow..Naz's dad is very diplomatic.. was good what he did...
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At 28 July 2008 at 22:16,
Mimzzzy said...
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i miss my mum....
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At 29 July 2008 at 12:01,
Just plain Sharon said...
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I am intrigued by Naz's dad's action. The ceremony was beautifully done. I know I'd shed a tear.
